I need to say I hear you!
One thing that I’ve learned specifically in counseling is that everyone needs to feel heard. Everyone needs to know that their concerns are legitimate I am deeply honored that many of you trust me to help. I will try to answer your questions and through my email newsletters introduce you to some other amazing resources. I’m meeting new authors and ministers. One thing we all have in common is a desire to serve, a desire to help. So, when you get an email from me introducing an author or ministry, it is an attempt to provide more than I can give you alone. But in the meantime, I will also do my very best to address the concerns that are shared with me through the questionnaire. In truth, these are the same types of questions and concerns that inspired me to start writing. These questions and concerns weighed on my heart. It bothered me that so many Christians weren’t getting their needs met already. This week, I want to talk about knowing our connection to the Spirit. I’ve wondered as so many others do, “Is it God speaking, or is it me?” Even in ministry, I would question myself. Someone did me the service though of asking me if I was praying and seeking His help. And was I giving Him control of my life? The answers were of course. a resounding yes. John Chapter 15 talks about abiding in Christ and Him and His word abiding in us. The idea is that the closer we get to Him and the more we stay in His presence, the more we know him. The man that famously argued with God and won was Abraham. When God was ready to destroy Sodom and Gomorrah, Abraham, probably knowing his nephew Lot was there argued with God. The essence of his argument was that it was against God’s nature to destroy good men with wicked ones (Genesis 18:17-33). The key here is that Abraham argued God’s nature. In essence, “Are you really going to do that? I know that’s not who you are.” Abraham was able to successfully argue with God because he was arguing from a point in line with God’s nature. This stands in start contrast to James contention that prayer based in our own desires will not be answered (James 4:3). One example is starting from a place of knowing God and in essence having the same desires as Him while the other is moving out of our own selves. So, how does this relate to knowing whether God is leading us or if we are just hearing our own thoughts? Well, it’s this concept of knowing God and moving out of that knowledge. Jesus speaks to this in the parable of the vine and branches found in John 15:1-11. Unlike some other parables, Jesus makes the meaning very clear. Those that abide in Him and He in them will bear much fruit and bring Glory to the Father. In verse 7 He specifies a method in which this connection is made. His words (in context – teachings) need to abide in us. This means that simply reading the Bible faithfully may not be the complete answer. If we walk away from reading our Bible and don’t take anything away from our time, then what good was that time? His teachings must abide in us, they must live in us and change us. They must draw our hearts and desires to be more in line with His. Does this mean that you can’t hear from God or be lead until you reach some specific level of maturity or Holiness? Does it mean that you have to have a certain amount of the Bible memorized? No! It may be a process, but it begins with the heart. as soon as you allow Him in; as soon as you are vulnerable enough, then He can begin to work in you and through you. So, that’s between you and God. I can’t answer for you if you have allowed Him in. I can’t answer if you have allowed yourself to be vulnerable to the Spirit to move in your life. That’s something for prayer and maybe some time spent with a spiritual mentor that knows you to help you decide. Another test is if whatever you are hearing is truly in line with the scriptures. Again, if you aren’t sure, leaning on a spiritual mentor is important here. But the more comfortable you get in Him and living in Him, then the more that you can trust that what you hear is from Him.
What These Desert Plants Can Tell Us About Anxiety and Planning
Anyone who gardens probably knows about zones. Zones for plants are primarily based on latitude. The zones then run primarily east to west. Plants are fairly picky about the climate where they grow. But altitude can affect the zone too. Despite being in a fairly southern zone, we live in a high desert mountain valley. Up in this altitude we have Joshua Trees. In the picture, there is a tree with spiky leaves. That’s a Joshua Tree. They thrive at altitudes around 3,000′ to 4,000′. Arizona is known of course for the Saguaro, also in this picture. Although they can grow up to 4,000′ they thrive closer to 2,000′ altitude. The two just don’t naturally mix. There is normally a very wide line between them. And yet, there is a small area along Arizona’s Highway 93 that just happens to be at the right altitude where they do mix quite happily. For someone who has lived in high desert mountain valleys most of my life, this is always a joy to see when we drive back and forth to Phoenix from our home. The point of interest here is plants that not only almost never mix, but grow in completely different areas. Yet there are strange occurrences where that wide broad line completely disappears. As a counselor, I’m all too aware that the vast majority of people live with a high level of anxiety they may not even be aware of. As in, we become so accustomed to carrying a high level of anxiety that we end up considering it to be our norm. When I work with people on changing what they think about (we’re told in Philippians 4:8 to think about things that are true, pure, lovely, commendable, excellent, and worthy of praise) they often come back with a list of very real concerns. Bills, getting along with other people, problems at work or school, and many more. I often talk about how to change our thinking, but today I want to talk about lines. None of our worries fit the description of the things we’re supposed to think about. But, many of them are very real. There are appropriate times to sit down with our bills and a calculator and figure out which ones we can pay Friday and which ones have to wait. Then it’s likely appropriate to call and make arrangements for the ones we won’t pay. During this process, our thoughts are naturally very close to the issues that cause anxiety. So feeling a little anxiety is normal and acceptable. (There should be some relief when you finish the planning session though, because you accomplished something!) So, at that point our thought lives and the troubles lurking out there are coexisting like the Saguaro and Joshua Tree in the picture above. While planning or dealing with a situation it makes sense to think about it. Where most of us need to make a change is realizing that under normal conditions, there should be a big fat line between potential worries and our thought lives. If I’m in the middle of my duties at work or maybe spending time with family and friends, then dwelling on my finances may be our norm. But it isn’t helpful. If my mind is supposed to be on a work task, but I’m fretting about my rent or car payment, then I’m not doing right by my employer or myself. These are not times when I can do anything about it. So, we adjust our focus to doing our job well, or enjoying the people we love. Then at the appropriate time (after we get off work on payday for example) we can take action on the plans we made. Again, the line can get a little narrower. If we can learn to do that, only focus on potential worries when we are planning or taking action, then we can create a separation between the two. As we get better at practicing that new skill (yes, it takes practice and you won’t always get it right) then life’s troubles and our thought lives will become as separate as the Saguaro and the Joshua Tree except for the very specific and brief times when they appropriately coexist. Give it a shot. But, if you can’t beat it on your own or there are other issues like a negative self-image that complicate things, don’t be afraid to reach out to myself or someone you can trust. Your mental, emotional, and spiritual health is just as important as your physical health! Get 30 Inspirational Memes in 30 Days I’ll also send weekly blog posts SubscribeWe won’t send you spam. Unsubscribe at any time.Built with ConvertKit
Learning My Own Lessons
When we look at the Israelites in the desert as they are wandering. It’s easy to look down on their level of trust. They see God provide, then a few verses later, they come across a new challenge and seem to have forgotten in just a moment or two how good God has been to them. But a moment or two of reading for us is much different from the time and experience of those living through the circumstances. It wasn’t just a moment or two of reading a page for them, it was longer in between and legitimate, real life feelings and fears. We like to think that we don’t do the same things. And yet, we do, When we look at the Israelites in the desert as they are wandering. It’s easy to look down on their level of trust. I experienced something very similar recently. I talk about trusting God and what that really looks like. Promoting a book is something I’m having to learn to do and there is as much advice about how to do it out there as there is for anything else. Some of it is obviously bad or unethical. But, I’ve been fortunate to find a few different sources that all seem trustworthy in both who they are and what they know. And they are all teaching pretty much the exact same things. This is important to me because my book that is out and the next one are both ministry and something that I believe God directed. So, it only makes sense to learn how to spread it far and wide. I recently had an opportunity to get some help, but that help was expensive. I felt good about it, but neither of the two people I went to for confirmation liked the idea. I said to both of them, “I either have to trust God with my book or my food.” Amy Connell interviewed me on her Graced Health Podcast. (Catch the interview here.) Even the title she gave it, Why the fortune of brokenness can enhance your relationship with God brought conviction to my heart. Then I listened to the interview and I felt a little foolish. You see, she got the term “fortune of brokenness” from my own book and asked me what it meant in the interview. In essence, I pointed out that in my early marriage, we knew we didn’t have anything. So we relied on God. A few years ago, I rediscovered that when things looked very dire for us. I remembered my need for complete and utter dependency on God. So now, my statement, “I have to trust God with the book or my food,” becomes utterly foolish. Even living with our minimal finances, we have developed a rhythm. The income is almost exactly the same each month and we’ve come to where we can count on it. Ahhh, there’s the danger zone. I knew what was coming in and I knew what had to go out. I stopped needing to trust God for it because it felt like a given. We’ve had a temporary blip where we have lost about 1/4 of our monthly income. I’m confident that it is very temporary, but that combined with my own teachings has reminded me that I need to trust God with the book AND my food. How much better will we be if we trust Him for everything and give Him credit when we don’t have to rather than the other way around?
Keeping Our Eyes on Him
You may know the story of Peter joining Jesus in walking on the water. If not you can find it in Matthew 14:22-33. (The following is also found in Matthew 14:13-22, just before the passage above.) Jesus had just gotten the news that his cousin and ‘predecessor,’ John had been beheaded. Jesus got into a boat and headed out, looking for some solitude. He wanted to be alone. We need to remember that Jesus deliberately and knowingly had emptied Himself to become like us (Philippians 2:5-7). This means that he felt the loss of His cousin very deeply and needed to grieve, just like any of us would. But when He went ashore, He saw that people had been walking from the villages in the hope of intercepting Him. By now His fame as a healer had spread and people desperate from their pain followed Him, hoping that they too would be healed. But when He went ashore, He saw that people had been walking from the villages in the hope of intercepting Him. By now His fame as a healer had spread and people desperate from their pain followed Him, hoping that they too would be healed. He went to be alone. Instead, He found a group of thousands waiting for Him. I think we sometimes miss the significance of His compassion. But instead of getting back in the boat or trying to avoid them, His compassion drew Him to them and He healed the sick. In the TV series The Chosen they show that at the end of one of these healing sessions, Christ is exhausted. I’m confident that the scriptwriters got it right. He started the day needing time alone to grieve. Then he healed thousands and miraculously fed them from just five loaves of bread and two fish. It’s no surprise that when it was all over he sent the disciples on ahead by boat. I somehow doubt He could have told them, “Go on ahead, I’ll walk!” And yet, that’s what he did. He sent the crowds away and went up on the mountain there to pray. It was a windy night and the disciples were not making good progress. Between 3 AM and 6 AM, he caught up to them. Peter, the eager beaver, whose eagerness outpaced his faith, asked Christ to call Him to come to Him. If Christ was walking on the water, Peter wanted that too. So Peter stepped over the side of the boat and began walking towards Jesus. But as he looked around and remembered the fierceness of the wind, he began to get scared. As he did, he began to sink. His focus shifted from the Lord to the worldly distractions around him. A verse commonly misquoted is Philippians 4:13. When taken in context, Paul is talking about how he had lived through having plenty (money, food, etc) and not having enough. He explains being able to be content through Christ. Although Mark 9:23 shows Christ saying that all things are possible through faith, I want to focus on this similarity between Paul and Peter. How do we get through trying times or scary circumstances? Either we struggle with stress and anxiety or we somehow live with contentedness. We need to keep our eyes on Christ! This may seem difficult when we’re already in a place of anxiety or stress. But, being proactive by living in Him will give us the strength to do that. To get more help with building a deeper, life-altering relationship with Christ, my book, How to be a Christian in Today’s World: Shame or Fear of Failure vs. Living Confidently in God’s Love might just help. Click the link below to see it on Amazon. How to be a Christian in Today’s World on Amazon
Amy Connell of Graced Health Released Her Podcast Interview of Me Today
I joined Amy Connell on the Graced Health podcast, where she has grace-filled conversations about physical, mental, and spiritual health. Amy and I share a deep conversation about some aspects of our faith that are harder to grasp. Per Amy – We discuss: The Christian “elephant in the room” and what it is The fortune of brokenness Matthew and his wife experienced in early adulthood and how that impacted his relationship with God God’s faithfulness and presence even as we weave in and out of our focus on him Encouragement for the person who thinks “I’ve been away so long I don’t think God would want me to come back” Authentically rejoicing even when we don’t feel like it Click on the image below to go to the podcast.
A Little Introduction and A Little About Joy
I’ll admit, this picture is a few years old, but the only real difference is that I have significantly more gray than I did here. But this is my beautiful bride and me after a “walk” around the neighborhood in our power chairs after church. It was Father’s Day and unseasonably cool so we decided to enjoy the weather and being together. Because she’s left-handed and I’m right-handed, we can roll down the street next to each other, holding hands. Much has happened since this photo, but this is still how I see my wife. This is how I saw her when she was laying in a hospital bed near death for months on end, just over a year ago. But, it’s not some silly dreamy thinking. This is who she is. This is the woman that has grown with me and is growing old with me. This is the woman that has worked just as hard as I have at learning to be good spouses. This is the woman that sees the same things in the world and in the calling that God has for us as I do. The beauty in it, is she’s seeing the same thing I am, on her own. She’s not just my “yes woman,” she prayerfully seeks God and listens. She’s then able to confirm what I’m hearing or makes me go back and check that I’m hearing correctly. The work that we’ve done in our own lives is what enables us to counsel marriages and people with depression or anxiety. Those smiles, they’re not “Instagram” smiles where as soon as the camera goes away, so do the smiles (and yes, I’m smiling too). These smiles are authentic to who we are. We are able to be these people despite our disabilities and struggles because of our trust in God and our choices to focus on things that are true, pure, lovely, commendable, and worthy of praise (Philippians 4:8). That’s how I deal with my disability and she with hers. Yes, we’ve had hard days. Yes, I’ve had days where I made it pretty clear to God that I didn’t care for the way He was handling things. And I’ve had many many days where I just wanted Him to let me in on the plan. Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for… (Hebrews 11:1) So, if I insist on knowing the plan, that doesn’t show as much faith! Like the Israelites wandering through the desert, I have evidence of God’s provision time and time again, and yet, I get tempted to worry or fear. But I have to say, without a doubt, that the years that I have had to rely on Him because I honestly don’t have what I need to survive have been the most years of my entire life! But one thing that we really try to do is to follow the Biblical command to “Rejoice Always.” The English dictionary defines rejoicing as feeling great joy. Then the dictionary says joy is to feel great happiness. So, “Feel great great happiness always?” No, I don’t think so. As a matter of fact, that’s just plain absurd! Rejoicing always is choosing each day at least to praise God and to be grateful for Him for something he’s given to you. I said each day. Tape a note to the inside of your bedroom door if you have to so that you remember to stop and choose to rejoice in Him or something He has done for you. But that’s not always is it? But START there. Then as you can remember, start doing it more often, etc. I’m not happy right now, I need a breathing treatment, my ankle hurts, and I don’t want to get dressed and go run an errand. I could focus on that. But, writing this post has reminded me to rejoice. I’m not happy, but I’m content and very grateful for all I have and all He has allowed me to do in His name. Someone asked what I need or who could they help to connect me to. I have no idea who this person was. But there are two things on my heart right now. I need to paint my house and put up a small awning to keep rain away from my front door to prevent further damage. I know God gave me the book that is out and the next book that’s about ready to come out – Blessed Brokenness: Seeing God’s Glory in the Ashes of Life. My wife and I are convinced that both of these are messages that need to get out, that they are messages God gave us. I need reviews on Amazon in particular (50 is the first magic number) and I need to get this mailing list and the books themselves in front of more people. I have never sent an email that said, “Please buy my book.” And I won’t. Of course, I hope you do. I truly believe that it will bless you! I keep the link in front of you and leave it at that. But yes, spreading the message of how much God loves each of us is important and any help that any of you can give will be greatly appreciated. (You can share a link to a blog post that inspired you on your social media. If you have a blog of your own, I’d be happy to write a guest post. If you have a podcast, I’d love to be interviewed. Whatever comes to mind.) I hope this little introduction brings us a little closer and you continue being blessed by what God gives me to share. By the way, I’ve referred to things people have asked here and in the past, I have a quick 4 question survey that I would love for you to take to help me continue to bring content that serves you! You can access the survey here.
Gentle Evangelism
Something in me says that evangelism shouldn’t be a divisive topic. And yet, over my years in ministry and my wide background among different denominations, opinions can be so strong that it almost seems like something folks would come to blows over. It’s not that the need for evangelism is questioned. Even liturgical churches want to see people come to faith, while others insist that it must be done by a specific prayer. An altar call for salvation is not something you’d see very often in several church groups and you’d see it every day in others. If you’ve read my book, then you already know that I’m not sure when in my Christian life I crossed the line to becoming what the scriptures consider a saving belief. Maybe that’s why evangelism is so uncomfortable for so many of us. We don’t want to face people and tell them that they are sinners and going to hell if they don’t repent and ask Jesus into their hearts. Don’t get me wrong, the fear of hell can be a perfectly legitimate motivator as long as that’s not the end of the Christian walk. After all, God is a God of love and relationship. I don’t mean relationship when we walk through the pearly gates, but I mean relationship right here, right now in our daily lives. As Christians, I hope we want that as much as He does. Yes, I know, because I have heard, all the many reasons that its scary and uncomfortable for people. And at some point, we need to accept that God is bigger than our fears. I need to get back on track before I digress too far. Evangelism is something that can seem big and scary. But, I contend that it begins with being real. It begins with being a Christian. It begins with living out our faith because we have accepted the raging fury that is the love of God. As we let it embrace us, it will flow through us and make us genuine, loving, Christians. Whether we are hoping to help our loved ones come to know Christ or a total stranger, the beginning is the same. And it doesn’t matter if we’re taught a memorized prayer or we just walk it out and confess our belief through reciting creeds in church. It’s being a Christian that matters. One of the best-known names in recent history is of course, Mahatma Ghandi. He had decided to visit a Christian church in Calcutta and was turned away at the door because the church was for the higher castes and whites only. That is what caused his famous saying, “I would be a Christian if it were not for the Christians.” We don’t have to be that segregationist to shove people away. People, especially those close to us will see our hypocritical actions and attitudes. Gandhi also believed that “A virtue achieves its potential only in its application and it ceases to have any use if it serves no purpose in daily life.” So what do I mean then by “Gentle Evangelism?” What I’m getting at is that sometimes the best way to make a difference is to simply live what we say we believe. If we do that in front of others and love them as Christ loved us, then we will be doing the best thing possible. God will convict people of sin and He will enable them to love. We have the simple (not always easy) job of just living in front of them and showing them love.
A Wonderful Ministry
I’ve recently become acquainted with author and podcaster, Amy Connell. I don’t think that Amy would ever call herself a minister, but that’s who she is and what she does. She’s a nutritionist and personal trainer by trade but in reality she is a minister. I had the amazing opportunity of being interviewed for an upcoming episode of her wonderful podcast, “Graced Health.” Her perspective is wonderful. She teaches that there is no standard that you have to adhere to and pressure to stay there. Instead, be who God made you to be! Now admittedly her target audience is Christian Women over 40. I meet 2 of those three criteria and am loving what she puts out. I strongly encourage the women over 40 in my audience to check out her book. It’s called, “Your Worthy Body: Find Freedom in Health by Breaking All the Rules.” you can find it on Amazon, the link is below. I also encourage you to listen to her podcast. Her guests all bring amazing perspectives on issues that are important to all of us. Again. her target audience is Christian Women over 40, but the ministry she shares is wonderful and I hope to be a long time friend and ally of hers. There is also a link below to her podcast. She also has a plethora of free resources including an amazing 14-day devotional There’s no BMI Chart in the Bible. As Amy would say, “Have a Graced Day!” DevotionalAmazon link for “Your Worthy Body: Find Freedom in Health by Breaking All the Rules.”Graced Health Podcast
The Holy Spirit Today
I was recently asked through the survey about the function of the Holy Spirit in the world today. Now, personally, this really excited me because the person that asked started out in a liturgical background just like I did and believes in the power of the Holy Spirit just like I do. I say, just like I do, but I don’t know that we’re exactly in line completely, but in my many years of ministry, I’ve found that there are a number of denominations that don’t really pay the Holy Spirit much attention at all. When I became a pastor in a denomination of one congregation, I quickly was challenged in some of the things I believed. I realized that some of the things I believed and even taught were man-made traditions. Now, I didn’t question them because they were taught by people that I respected greatly and I had heard the same things many times from many different sources. That’s no excuse however for spreading man-made traditions as truth. That was, after all, the biggest issue that Christ had with the religious leaders of His day. They had taken God’s law and probably originally to help people understand it added details that became absolutely ridiculous. Their traditions weren’t in the scriptures but were taught as “the law.” I get it, part of our nature as humans is to draw lines. We like structure, we like concrete. Throughout society, there are lines drawn, some make sense, and others feel arbitrary, especially when you get caught on the wrong side of them. But we have to draw lines somewhere to keep things fair for everyone. So drawing lines comes naturally to us. The problem is that our human lines rarely leave room for God to be God. 1 Corinthians 1:25 says that God’s foolishness is higher than man’s wisdom. We can’t box Him in because we can’t fully comprehend Him. So, how does the Holy Spirit function today, and better yet, how do we function WITH the Holy Spirit? First, we need to understand who and what the Holy Spirit is. If you read John chapter 16, the resurrected Christ is meeting with the disciples for the last time. Of course, they are filled with sorrow and don’t want Him to go. They’ve come to a point where they hang on to every word and have seen any number of miraculous things done by Him. But He tells them they need to let Him go so that He can send the Spirit of truth. This Spirit is to be a comforter and a guide. In Romans 7 and 8, Pauls talks at length about his inability to do the right things. If left to his own strength alone, he will fall victim to the desires of the flesh. That is those things that feel good and are self-serving. But he also says that with the help of the Spirit, he can be a different man. This is the same man that lists his trials and sufferings in the latter half of 2 Corinthians 16 and is the same man that says that through Christ, He can do all things (often misquoted), after He says how he can be content in easy and hard circumstances. In my second book, which will come out in a few months, Blessed Brokenness: Seeing God’s Glory in the Ashes of Life, I tell the story of a miraculous healing that happened under my hand. I’ve seen others. And maybe most importantly, me. I love my wife. I do. She knows that when we met, I latched onto her and wanted to marry her because I was lonely and tired of it and she was gorgeous. When we got along, we got along great. But I wasn’t capable of loving her (used here as a verb). By nature, I am an uptight, angry, uppity jerk. That’s the flesh. But nobody that meets me today sees that (I think). Oh, sometimes when I’m dealing with certain companies on the phone, the flesh starts to creep out and I have to lean in to the Spirit to push it back down. What I’ve found, and what I believe, is that if we make ourselves vulnerable to the Spirit, He will guide us and intercede for us. But, I think the hardest part for most of us is that vulnerability. We’re so used to doing things on our own that letting the Spirit in is scary. Romans 8:26 says that we don’t even know how to pray, but the Spirit will intercede will utterances and groanings. Verse 27 basically says that the Spirit knows both our hearts and God’s. That’s a loose translation, but it gets the main gist across. And for the person that asked the question – I believe that liturgy is beautiful and can free one to really focus on the beauty of God, which could actually allow one to let the Spirit in. Unfortunately, most liturgical churches teach that the spirit isn’t active today. A common criticism of liturgical churches is that things are laid out and many of the responsive readings are repeated so much that the congregants don’t have to pay attention to them to participate. The same criticism can fall on any church. The individual doesn’t have to pay attention. The easiest way in my mind to live a life full of the Holy Spirit is to draw closer to God. And open your hearts and minds to Him and allow Him to lead you and comfort you. It may take a little practice, we’re good at doing things our way. But, over time, it gets easier and easier. Be blessed, my friends. If you’d be willing to answer a 4 question survey that helps me make sure I am serving relevant content, please click here.
Connection with God
I sent out a link to a survey a week or two ago and a few answered the four questions. I’m trying to find a way to address the concerns that came up in the survey through my blog posts. After all, I want to know that these posts mean something to you, the reader. (I have journals for things that only mean anything to me.) One of the things that I struggle with is that the answers to several of the questions are really very closely related. Sometimes we feel alone, as though even God has abandoned us. Sometimes we feel like that’s what we deserve! And if we’re honest, that’s probably actually what we do indeed deserve. The Bible says that if we have hatred for our brother, we might as well have already committed murder (1 John 3:15). There are others, but this is a blog post, not a book and if I pile it on, I have to dig us back out of it. The point is that no matter our outward behavior, it is our heart that really matters. Yet, we humans find it so hard to truly be loving all the time (especially on the inside). I’m not immune, as a caregiver and advocate for my wife, she congratulates me when I hang up the phone after a call with a difficult office and she had listened to me catch myself halfway through the call. My voice and my words would be getting harsher, then I would remember that the person I was talking to was not to blame, at least not completely. But, by nature, I am an angry, uptight person. I’m not the guy that says, “Listen, I know it’s not your fault, but I really need you to help me fix this.” No, by nature, I’m the guy that gets hung up on! That’s by nature. Our human nature is so broken. Whether you believe in Original Sin (that even infants are born into sin) or not, if you are reading this, you live the battle. Paul starts in Romans 7:15 and continues well into Romans 8 (let’s call it verse 4 for now) talking about the battle between our flesh (us by nature) and the Spirit. When we live in the flesh, God will feel very distant, and being a ‘good Christian’ will be nigh impossible. Now I admit, this passage is among Paul’s most wordy and convoluted, but it is, for me anyway, one of the central passages that provide direction to living in Him, which includes knowing we’re in His presence. I hope you read it on your own in your favorite translations. Go ahead and do it now, I promise not to go anywhere. The essence of this is that the only way to get this unruly flesh under control is to LEAN IN to the Spirit. Now, some people cock their heads when I say that, but it’s the best way I know how to convey the message in any concise manner. As we do (and yes, it might take a little practice) we will find the strength to be who we want to be and we will do so because we have put ourselves in His presence. One of my pastor buddies likes to say, “God is a gentleman, he’ll never force Himself on you.” But, just as He won’t force Himself on you, He is always right there. Toby Mac, during a concert monologue years ago, said that all that stuff that was separating you from God, well you don’t have to walk back through it all to get to Him. It’s so true. There is a point I must concede though. Our world, including many of our friends within the church, encourages a very different life. We value the ‘self-made man’! He’s a hero, an idol, in our culture. That’s the complete opposite to leaning in to the Spirit. I had a young teenager in my counseling office once. On my intake paperwork, she had checked the box next to “Fear of men or women.” When I asked her about that, she said she didn’t like old men, There I was, sitting there with my fat belly and silver beard and hair. It was all I could do not to burst into laughter. I think I did grin a little when I said, “Well, what about me, I’m an old man?” She replied, “Yeah, but you’re chill.” I know that if I met my natural self on the street, well I probably wouldn’t like me very much. But then, it is in that weakness that I allow Him to be strong on my behalf. And that is when I can rejoice that I am in His presence. I never want to use these posts to plug my book. But I do address these issues in much more depth in “How to be a Christian in Today’s World: Shame or Fear of Failure vs. Living Confidently in God’s Love.”
